Ecclesiastes Part III

Ecclesiastes Part III

     This is the third and final posting for the questions for the Book of Ecclesiastes. Ecclesiastes is a mournful and depressing book, much like many in the Bible, but the difference I find with Ecclesiastes is its depth of depression that very obviously originates with the horribly hopeless idea that EVERYTHING is meaningless. Remember, this absurd and deeply melancholy notion of meaninglessness is in text that is supposed to be inspired by God. You might think that a God of everlasting love and immutable beauty would be more adept to something more along the lines of shining inspiration, truly happy words that uplift and encourage. I guess not.

1. Ecclesiastes 10:4

     4 If a ruler’s anger rises against you, do not leave your post; calmness can lay great offenses to rest.

Questions

     1. If calmness can lay great offenses to rest why doesn't it work when it comes to the anger of God when He thinks people have really offended Him? 

     2. People pray and plead and put on sackcloth and all kinds of shit, and does God reign in His anger? Sure, after He promotes a new pestilence, kills a couple of really innocent people, ravages the crops, and causes a mighty flood that kills a b-zillion people, right?

     3. Do not leave your post. Does this infer that people should not forsake their belief in God, even when really screwy things happen because God is supposedly angry? If they stay at their POST and maintain their belief is that supposed to bring the calmness that gives rest to their supposed offenses?

2. Ecclesiastes 10:11

     11 If a snake bites before it is charmed, the charmer receives no fee.

Questions

     1. What about the greatest snake charmer of them all, God? What about Him? Why should God receive His fee of glory when He fucks up everything He does from the very start? 

     2. God creates this innocent man and woman in the Garden of Eden and they make a huge mistake, yet they don't know any better because they don't know about good and evil and disobedience because God didn't create them with such knowledge. So, God's planning and creation fails from the very freaking beginning and He punishes man for God's bullshit mistake and STILL tries to collect on his fee of glory?

3. Ecclesiastes 10:20

     20 Do not revile the king even in your thoughts, or curse the rich in your bedroom, because a bird in the sky may carry your words, and a bird on the wing may report what you say.

Questions

     1. Sooo, God/the Lord is the ultimate Big Brother, isn't He? Be careful of what you say because a little bird might go back and report what you said to someone who just might put your ass in a sling? So much for being born free.

4. Ecclesiastes 11:3

     3 If clouds are full of water, they pour rain on the earth. Whether a tree falls to the south or to the north, in the place where it falls, there it will lie.

Questions

     1. Sure, in the place where the tree falls it will lie, but when it falls and there is no one around to hear it fall does it still make a sound?

5. Ecclesiastes 11:5

     5 As you do not know the path of the wind, or how the body is formed in a mother’s womb, so you cannot understand the work of God, the Maker of all things.

Questions

     1. Isn't it true that we now know the patterns of the wind on the earth and what causes the wind?

     2. Isn't it true that we now know how a fetus develops within a woman's body?

     3. If we now know these things then wouldn't it stand to reason we CAN understand the work of God?

6. Ecclesiastes 11:8-10

     8 However many years anyone may live, let them enjoy them all. But let them remember the days of darkness, for there will be many. Everything to come is meaningless.

     9 You who are young, be happy while you are young, and let your heart give you joy in the days of your youth. Follow the ways of your heart and whatever your eyes see, but know that for all these things God will bring you into judgment.

     10 So then, banish anxiety from your heart and cast off the troubles of your body, for youth and vigor are meaningless.

Questions

     1. What do the days of darkness matter if everything to come is meaningless?

     2. If everything to come is meaningless and if the judgment is part of what is to come, doesn't it also make sense that the judgment would be meaningless as well?

     3. Verse ten says to cast off troubles and banish anxiety, but what do these things matter if everything is meaningless?

     4. Why banish anxiety and cast off troubles when Ecclesiastes 7:3 says that frustration is better than laughter and a sad face is good for the heart?

7. Ecclesiastes 12:14

     14 For God will bring every deed into judgment, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil.

Questions

     1. Ecclesiastes 12:8 says that everything is meaningless. This is not the only verse that states such. In fact, much of Ecclesiastes is about everything being meaningless. If everything is meaningless, why in the world would God judge anything?

     2. If something is meaningless is it still worthy to be judged? If so WHY?

     3. Would judging the meaningless be considered pointless? If God is judging the meaningless wouldn't He be behaving in a pointless manner? Why would a perfect divine being behave in a pointless manner?

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=ester+lighthorse

http://www.amazon.com/Turkey-Broth-Spirit-Questions-Pentateuch-ebook/dp/B00GVLQ0CY/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1400096916&sr=8-3&keywords=ester+lighthorse

http://www.zazzle.com/smartytwoshoes

Proverbs Part II

Proverbs Part II

     Here is the second and final posting for the questions for the Book of Proverbs. As previously mentioned this book does consist largely of verses repeated again and again and worded a b-zillion different ways. Was King Solomon running out of things to say? It is entirely possible.

1. Proverbs 18:6

     6 The lips of fools bring them strife, and their mouths invite a beating.

Questions
     1. Sooo, does this mean it is okay to beat the piss out of people who you think desperately deserve it?

2. Proverbs 18:15

     15 The heart of the discerning acquires knowledge, for the ears of the wise seek it out.

Questions
     1. If the Lord/God is the ultimate in everything, including wisdom, and if the ears of the wise seek out knowledge and the Lord has ears, does the Lord ALSO seek out knowledge?

     2. If the Lord/God is the ultimate in everything does He EVER have to seek out any kind of knowledge or understanding or wisdom in regard to anything?

3. Proverbs 18:17

     17 In a lawsuit the first to speak seems right, until someone comes forward and cross-examines.

Questions
     1. Is this more of the wonderful and expansive knowledge and wisdom of Solomon? Seriously?

     2. Isn't the first to speak in a lawsuit the plaintiff? 

     3. Wouldn't a person of WISDOM not make any assumptions about who is right or wrong in a lawsuit until both have spoken and all evidence is brought forth? Who in the hell thinks that the first person to speak in a lawsuit is the right one, hummm?

4. Proverbs 19:11

     11 A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.

Questions
     1. Much of the Bible discusses the persistent anger of God as well as His consistency in punishing even the smallest of offenses. Did the Lord/God not consider this verse?

     2. If the Lord/God is not very patient, what does that signify in regards to His level of wisdom?

     3. It is to one's glory to overlook an offense? Sooo, is the person doing the overlooking doing so because they want glory, or because they want to be nice or generous or kind?

     4. Why would a smart fellow like Solomon even mention something so trite as glory when gain of glory is the wrong reason to do something that is supposed to be right in the first place?

5. Proverbs 19:14

     14 Houses and wealth are inherited from parents, but a prudent wife is from the Lord.

Questions
     1. Sooo, the person who marries an imprudent wife has been more or less screwed over by the Lord, right? I mean, if a prudent wife is from the Lord why wouldn't the Lord give such a wife to, say, a really good guy (or gal)? Don't lots of nice folk who don't deserve the bitchy wiles of an imprudent woman end up with such for a wife?

6. Proverbs 19:16

     16 Whoever keeps commandments keeps their life, but whoever shows contempt for their ways will die.

Questions
     1. Sooo, if you want to keep your life you have to keep the commandments? Wouldn't this include the commandments to stone people for various reasons?

     2. Do people realize there are far more than the well known Ten Commandments that the Lord/God supposedly gave people? Are they not supposed to follow ALL of them? Why don't they?

7. Proverbs 19:17

     17 Whoever is kind to the poor lends to the Lord, and he will reward them for what they have done.

Questions
     1. The Lord/God is always promising rewards here and there to people for various things. Do these people ever get them? Are these rewards from the Lord/God supposed to be in the afterlife? 

     2. Are there kind people who do not lend to the poor?

     3. If lending to the poor is lending to the Lord, is the Lord poor and in need of lending? Is this why televangelists are always asking people for money to give to Jesus?

8. Proverbs 19:18

     18 Discipline your children, for in that there is hope; do not be a willing party to their death.

Questions
     1. Sooo, does Solomon mean physical discipline or discipline more along the lines of working with the child and showing them by example and speaking with them?

9. Proverbs 19:19

     19 A hot-tempered person must pay the penalty; rescue them, and you will have to do it again.

Questions
     1. Really? Well, the Lord/God seems to be pretty hot tempered. Who the hell is going to rescue Him?

     2. God/the Lord is consistently hot tempered. What penalty will He have to pay?

10. Proverbs 20:4

     4 Sluggards do not plow in season; so at harvest time they look but find nothing.

Questions
     1. If a person is too goddamn lazy to plow their fields, how in the hell would they suddenly get the energy at harvest time to get their lazy asses up to look for what they didn't plant in the first freaking place?!

11. Proverbs 20:9
     9 Who can say, “I have kept my heart pure; I am clean and without sin”?

Questions
     1. Exactly. WHO can say such? Can the Lord/God say such?

     2. Is anger and killing people out of anger a sin? Aren't there plenty of stories in the Bible of God being severely angry and killing people in the heat of that anger?

     3. Is God clean and pure and without sin?


12. Proverbs 20:12
     12 Ears that hear and eyes that see— the Lord has made them both.

Questions
     1. And what about the ears that do not hear and the eyes that do not see? Doesn't the Lord make them also? Why would He make something that does not function properly?


13. Proverbs 20:30
     30 Blows and wounds scrub away evil, and beatings purge the inmost being.

Questions
     1. Sooo, Solomon IS condoning beating the crap out of people?

     2. People in prison get the shit beat out of them all the time. If blows and wounds scrub away evil...well, why do these morons always end up right back in prison?


14. Proverbs 21:8
     8 The way of the guilty is devious, but the conduct of the innocent is upright.

Questions
     1. What is the point of having Solomon say that the way of the guilty is devious? Isn't such apparent?

     2. If the way of the innocent is so upright why is it punished so often?


15. Proverbs 22:1
     1 A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.

Questions
     1. Not that many verses ago Solomon said that it was wisdom that was more desirable than riches, but now it is a good name that is more desirable? What changed his mind?


16. Proverbs 22: 24-25
     24 Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered,

     25 or you may learn their ways and get yourself ensnared.

Questions
     1. Well, God/the Lord is hot tempered and angry. Should people associate with the Lord?

     2. Do terrorists of any religion act in the hideous ways that they do because they have been ensnared by the anger of their God?


17. Proverbs 25:21-22
     21 If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.

     22 In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the Lord will reward you.

Questions
     1. Sooo, the Lord is rewarding because of what? Because of making the enemy feel like they have burning coals on their head, or because someone fed another person (which is what you do when people are hungry, right?)?


18. Proverbs 28:14
     14 Blessed is the one who always trembles before God, but whoever hardens their heart falls into trouble.

Questions
     1. Why is the one who always trembles before God always blessed? Is it because God gets something from the trembling person? What does He get? 

     2. Does God translate the trembling of those before Him into glory?


19. Proverbs 29:22
     22 An angry person stirs up conflict, and a hot-tempered person commits many sins.

Questions
     1. Sooo, if the Lord/God is so very hot tempered (and oh yes my MY He is) how many sins has He committed? How many conflicts has He stirred up?


20. Proverbs 30:5-6
     5 Every word of God is flawless; he is a shield to those who take refuge in him.

     6 Do not add to his words, or he will rebuke you and prove you a liar.

Questions
     1. Every word of God is flawless? Really? If that is the case why don't more of the followers of God follow ALL of the commandments of God given in the Bible?


http://www.amazon.com/Turkey-Broth-Spirit-Questions-Pentateuch-ebook/dp/B00GVLQ0CY/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1399668996&sr=8-3&keywords=ester+lighthorse

II Samuel Part III: Just a Few Questions

Never a Dull Moment for the LORD's Chosen

Well, as we come to the close of our questions for the book of II Samuel, surely you have seen that things really don't seem all that hot for the chosen people of God. Why is that?

1. II Samuel 16:21-22

21 Ahithophel told him, "Go and sleep with your father's concubines, for he has left them here to look after the palace. Then all Israel will know that you have insulted your father beyond hope of reconciliation, and they will throw their support to you."

22 So they set up a tent on the palace roof where everyone could see it, and Absalom went in and had sex with his father's concubines.

Questions

     1) What the hell kind of advisor gives his leader this type of advice?

     2) How was it that Absalom did not realize this was like the worst advice to take?

     3) Courage will win the respect of people. Since when does shaming do the same?

2. II Samuel 18:18

18 During his lifetime, Absalom had built a monument to himself in the King's Valley, for he said, "I have no son to carry on my name." He named the monument after himself, and it is known as Absalom's Monument to this day.

Questions

     1) Oh my, but don't we have yet another biblical SNAFU here? Absalom said he had no son to carry on his name? Really?

   2) Doesn't II Samuel 14:27 clearly say that three sons and a daughter were born unto Absalom?

     3) Did Absalom's sons die?

3. II Samuel 20:3

3 When David came to his palace in Jerusalem, he took the ten concubines he had left to look after the palace and placed them in seclusion. Their needs were provided for, but he no longer slept with them. So each of them lived like a widow until she died.

Questions

     1) Sooo...these women were placed into seclusion because of what Absalom did? The women pay for the shame of what Absalom did? Is that supposed to be balanced?

4. II Samuel 20:21-22

21 That's not my purpose. All I want is a man named Sheba son of Bicri from the hill country of Ephraim, who has revolted against King David. If you hand over this one man to me, I will leave the town in peace." "All right," the woman replied, "we will throw his head over the wall to you."

22 Then the woman went to all the people with her wise advice, and they cut off Sheba's head and threw it out to Joab. So he blew the ram's horn and called his troops back from the attack. They all returned to their homes, and Joab returned to the king at Jerusalem.

Questions

     1) Throw his head over the wall? This was considered wise advice?

5. II Samuel 21:1

1 There was a famine during David's reign that lasted for three years, so David asked the LORD about it. And the LORD said, "The famine has come because Saul and his family are guilty of murdering the Gibeonites."

Questions

     1) Sooo...because of something Saul and his family has done the ENTIRE people get to suffer from famine? And people who are believers wonder why other people want nothing to do with this pathological God of theirs?

6. II Samuel 21:2

2 So the king summoned the Gibeonites. They were not part of Israel but were all that was left of the nation of the Amorites. The people of Israel had sworn not to kill them, but Saul, in his zeal for Israel and Judah, had tried to wipe them out.

Questions

     1) Sooo...did Saul know of the agreement to not kill the Gibeonites?

    2) Did anyone ever try to stop Saul from killing the Gibeonites and explain to him why he should stop?

     3) Did the LORD ever take Saul aside and tell him to stop killing the Gibeonites, or did the LORD just decide to allow for a famine and eventually someone would have the marbles to ask why the famine was happening?

7. II Samuel 21:5-6

5 Then they replied, "It was Saul who planned to destroy us, to keep us from having any place at all in the territory of Israel.

6 So let seven of Saul's sons be handed over to us, and we will execute them before the LORD at Gibeon, on the mountain of the LORD." "All right," the king said, "I will do it.

Questions

     1) Well, it seems as though the rules of atonement to not get any better when asking humans instead of the LORD, right?

     2) Nothing like laying the groundwork for the ridiculousness of Jesus dying for sins He never committed, right? Here we have the wrong that Saul committed, and SOMEBODY has to pay for it so we are going to put these guys to death. Is that how it goes?

8. II Samuel 21:9

9 The men of Gibeon executed them on the mountain before the LORD. So all seven of them died together at the beginning of the barley harvest.

Questions

   1) Sooo...is executing people for things they did not do okay since the executions supposedly took place before the LORD?

     2) How did the people know the LORD was there watching? How did they know for sure He was there?

     3) Why does God watch people die?

9. II Samuel 22:3

3 my God is my rock, in whom I find protection. He is my shield, the power that saves me, and my place of safety. He is my refuge, my savior, the one who saves me from violence.

Questions

     1) The one who saves you from violence? You're kidding, right?

     2) Your God is a rock? You mean like talking to a rock when you need help and He won't help you, or when He will not listen and stop killing those who have done nothing wrong?

     3) He is your refuge and savior? You mean so long as you do all of the dastardly things He asks you to do, right?

10. II Samuel 24:15

15 So the LORD sent a pestilence on Israel from the morning until the appointed time. And there died of the people from Dan to Beersheba 70,000 men.

Questions

     1) Sooo...the LORD murders 70,000 people as a punishment upon Israel? Maybe this could be part of the problem why the people of Israel will never number as the stars of the heavens, right? I mean, Jesus Christ! God keeps killing them in large numbers.

http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=ester+lighthorse

http://shoon4774-thegreatestlieevertold.blogspot.com/

http://www.zazzle.com/smartytwoshoes

https://sites.google.com/site/wiseonecartooncreations/

http://www.zazzle.com/biblical_myth_periodic_table_of_elements_posters-228084324809883766

http://toleratingaggressivereligioushumor.blogspot.com/